Sophie's Birthday

After finishing up the book of Job in the Bible during my daily devotionals, I felt the mortal finiteness of myself and the omnipotence of God and His incomprehensible wisdom. I was reminded once again that God can do anything, and I cannot.

Today was my daughter's birthday party. I had been planning it for a month. I bought all the decorations to match the theme, made all the signs, ordered all the food and a birthday cake, hired an award-winning balloon artist and designed how the whole 3 hours would be played out. I even printed black-and-white photos of her past year and made backings for them out of scrapbooking card stocks, I dripped each photo with a crystal on a patterned string and was planning to hang them on the tangerine tree branches in the backyard. I thought I was doing a lot and was smart about every little detail. However, like Job, but maybe not to his extent, I was shown what a limited being I was.

Yesterday morning when I checked the weather for today, it showed that during the 3 hours of what's supposed to be Sophie's birthday party, there were going to be 40%-60% chance of rain, and then it would be sunny again for the rest of the night and unto the next day. I began to worry. All the planning might go to waste because of the rain. I though to myself, "it is freaking California. It hardly rains. Why all of the sudden? Why during Sophie's birthday party, where I invited at least 18 kids to come along with their parents?" It never crossed my mind that I'd have to try to make a plan B in case of rain. I was annoyed.

For the following 24 hours, I had never checked the forecast updates so frequently in my life. I clicked the live map to see the prediction of the wind currents and cloud movements. I kept refreshing the weather page hoping to see a change in the percentage of the raining possibilities. Opposite of my hopes and dreams, the percentage never decreased. The indications showed that it would start to rain right when I were suppose to start the party, and it were going to last throughout the duration of the party. I was sad, and I had no power to change the weather. It's up to God.

I didn't sleep too well last night, obviously trying to check for more weather updates. During the middle of the night, I thought God spoke to me in a comforting voice that things were going to be ok, the party would be fine, and the rain would not come during the party. However, I, of little faith, really, really little faith, didn't believe or trust Him. I struggled all night thinking about what I can do to not have the party attendees be rained on. I was trying so hard using my own power but I still felt helpless the more I checked for weather updates, because nothing changed in the forecast.

However when morning came, in spite of my weakness and unbelieving heart, God came through for me. He showed me crisp air, spare white clouds, gorgeous blue sky,  and 4 mph wind speed. That was all I needed to start decorating and putting everything outside in the backyard.

I was so thankful, yet ashamed of my disbelieve. I wasted so much energy just worrying, and I lost sleep over things I cannot control, yet God had already told me that He would take care of this.

Right when all the guests were leaving after the 3+ hours of partying and feasting, the rain came crashing down like the dam had opened its flood gate, accompanied by loud thunders. It was truly a miracle.

If this lesson had taught me anything, it would be to trust God fully, and to listen carefully to Him when He speaks, also, to be humble to realize my mortality and to recognize His deity. I can only give all the glory and praises to God, my Father in Heaven. Thank you for loving on us, showing mercy especially when we are weak, and caring for Your daughter Sophie, because she had a blast today at her birthday party. =)

The Present

I've been thinking a lot about my life as of today. I enjoy spending time with my two kids very much. Everyday after lunch, we would take a nap together on the king size bed, and before we fall asleep, we would cuddle and wrestle, and I would squeeze them tight and toss them up in the air, and they would hug and kiss me all over and pile on top of me. I love our pre-nap-time play so much, it's what I look forward to everyday. I enjoy this love we share with one another, and I love being their mom, the one they need so much, all the time. However, I know that this will not last forever. They will grow up little by little before my eyes, and sooner or later, they will get embarrassed even by a small hug or a little kiss from me, especially in front of their friends. As a mom, I will need to learn to let them go little by little each year until they become adults and have families of their own. One day, hopefully in a very distant future, I will part from life on this earth and they will have to say goodbye to me.

I know that every human being possess this sense that nothing lasts forever. Amidst joy and celebration, there's also a lingering feeling of sadness that "who knows when we'll get to do this again with all the people here right now". I feel that way sometimes at home as I play with my two preschoolers. I know that little by little they'll grow up and they won't be this cute forever, and they won't be this innocent forever, and they won't be this needy forever. Soon they won't need a mid-day nap anymore, our night time story will not exist one day, and our backyard swing, slide and playhouse will be crawling with spiders and piled with dusts because they will not want to play on them anymore. I say this a lot to my kids, "Can you guys just stop growing and be this little forever?" Their response is always the variations of, "No, I want to grow BIG and TALL, like you, mommy." 

At each stage of life, there are different things we are working on, and changes we need to learn to accept and adapt to, but a lot of times, life is mundane, to be honest. I think if our life is full of excitement all the time, everyday, like in those action movies, we wouldn't be able to have the mental capacity to handle it anyways. God is merciful, thankfully, most of our days are pretty peaceful and ordinary. However, because our days are so comfortable sometimes, we forget to enjoy it. From the poem I Dream I Had An Interview With God, I really like how the poet writes about what God's response is regarding mankind,

"God answered, That they get bored with childhood, They rush to grow up, Then long to be children again. That they lose there health to make money, then lose there money to restore there health. That by thinking anxiously about there future, they forget the present. That they live as if they will never die, then die as if they have never lived."

 I wouldn't say this is my mid-life crisis blog entry or anything like that. In fact, I am not feeling the least bit of pessimism right now as I am writing this. I guess all I want to say is, don't forget to enjoy today, no matter how ordinary it might seem, and always be thankful for the Giver for what He has provided for us, right now, at this moment.

Matthew 6:34 New International Version (NIV) "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

Here is to a good Monday and a good week ahead of us!

Wait For Mommy

In this day and age, we're always in a hurry getting things done or getting somewhere on time, that we often rush our little ones along. This is something that I dislike--rushing kids and make them feel they're behind. Although I must admit, I couldn't resist doing it from time to time, too.

Thinking back to my childhood, when life used to be much simpler, my parents would always take me to my grandparents to spend the whole day with them on Sundays. My cousin and I would just climb trees, pick fruits from the trees, ride our red tricycle around Grandpa's backyard and watch Sunday afternoon children's TV programs. We also got to observe how my grandpa took care of his garden or practice his Chinese calligraphy, and how my grandma and mom cooked meals in the kitchen. Time felt irrelevant during those days, and I remembered it like it was a beautiful dream.

Staying home with the kids, I often try to squeeze in cleaning the house, washing dishes or doing laundry and picking up after the kids as they play. Throughout the day, they'd ask me to get something for them that they couldn't reach or do something for them that don't know how to do on their own. When I am in the middle to finishing up a chore, I'd ask them to wait for mommy to finish up. It's not that I can't drop what I am doing and help them right away, but I want them to learn how to wait and have patience at a young age. They used to throw a fit when they didn't get what they wanted right away, but I can see that slowly, by practicing waiting, they are much calmer as they wait for me to finish up whatever I am doing until they get helped. It's second nature to them to "wait for mommy" now. I think as of today, I suddenly see the fruit of my labor--enduring through all the whining and tantrums when I asked them to "wait for mommy" all these times before, I just thought, I'd share this little joy with all of you.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 says, "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. "

The first attribute of love is being patient. How hard is it to achieve being a patient person in this consumeristic, fast-food society? I guess we all need to be reminded from time to time to slow down and enjoy what we have at the moment. I don't need my children to learn every skill there is out there that have classes for, but I need them to learn how to live a full and enjoyable life knowing and practicing what love is in God's eyes.

Kangovou

I recently came across Kangovou. It's an American company started by two mothers. They designed a set of stainless steel kid's dish-ware that are BPA, PVC, lead, melamine, phthalate free. The products are made in South Korea. When I ordered them on the internet, I had to wait at least 5 weeks to get the products due to backordering. 

Here are the two sweet boxes when they arrived at my door. I ordered the Ice Mint colored set for Brandon, and the Peaches and Cream colored set for Sophie.

The dish-ware set was packaged very artistically and securely.

After opening the lid of the box, the compartment plate with lid is neatly tucked under. 

The second layer is consist of the sippy cup, cereal bowl and the snack bowl. 

 The bottom layer is the flat plate.

 Here is the whole family together =)

So far,  the kids and I have been enjoying the dish-ware set quite well.

On the other note, poor Brandon has been having fever for the past 3 days. I am thankful for all the people who cared and prayed for him. He's doing a lot better this morning. Hopefully he'll be fully recovered in no time.

Creatology

I found these for buy one get one free at Michael's. Each box is consists of pre-cut craft foam sheets at different thickness and shapes, which can be used to put together a 3D structure. 

Sophie was excited to begin building. 

The foam sheets when they were first taken out of the box:

We found different stickers and figured out their places according to the instruction, and so let the building commence!

The egg-shaped house is up!

Making the landscapes for around the house

Putting Easter animals in front of the house

Brandon is helping too!

After one hour, the cute Easter house is done! Sophie remained focused during that whole hour from start to finish. She was so proud when everything came together so beautifully.

Here are some details of the house:

The next day, we decided to go ahead and finish the 2nd box.

Sophie loved the goggly eyes on the owls and the bunnies. She was the one who put them on for the animals, actually. ^^

This Saturday our church is going to host an Easter egg hunt! Both Brandon and Sophie are super excited, especially after they built these two houses and got into the spirit of Easter!

A Year Slipped By

Looking back on my previous post, a year of time has slipped through my fingers. Actually a lot has happened within this past year.

First of all, we bought a house!

Not long after that, Brandon turned 1!

Then I got a job as a music teacher at a preschool-kindergarten and worked there for a semester.

During that four months, while my paycheck was the second best thing for our family, I lost the first best thing, which was time with my children. Everyday, I found myself acting like a strict military officer rather than a fun and loving mom.

In the morning,

"Hurry and wake up!"
"Hurry and get dressed!"
"Hurry and eat your breakfast!"
"Hurry and get your belongings ready!"

In the afternoon after I picked up the kids,

"Hurry and eat your dinner!"
"Hurry to take your bath, stop playing!"
"Hurry and go to bed!"

While working at the school was fun because I got to meet many wonderful teachers and super adorable children, I didn't feel at peace. Many times while driving to work, I would listen to online sermons that would just make me tear up. I felt that I couldn't spend quality time with my children day in and day out. I felt like I was always antsy and short tempered with Sophie and Brandon, and I was constantly trying to hurry them on so they could fit into my schedule.

However, the thing that urged me to resign wasn't quite just this. My dear mother-in-law was actually diagnosed with 1st stage breast cancer during the same time. She and my father-in-law live all the way in Hong Kong. I thought about how she helped and blessed us the past decade with her love, and I thought about the fact that I only have one mother-in-law, but I could have many jobs throughout my lifetime. I thought that it would cheer her up greatly if she could spend time with her grandchildren during this upstream battle with cancer. For that reason, I quit. I took both kids to live in Hong Kong with my in-laws for two months, and it was a blessed and unforgettable time for all of us.

3 days after we came back to the States, Sophie turned 3! We celebrated her birthday early while we were still in Hong Kong. Daddy also reunited with us, and we were all very glad!

The kids grew up a lot in Hong Kong. They are more independent, self-motivated and understanding. The best of all was that they got Mommy back -- the old mommy who would play with them, read with them, and draw with them, not the military officer lady who was saying "hurry" all the time. ^_~

So here I am, becoming a stay-home mom once again, and loving every day with my two little buttons. I am more grateful to be a mom than ever before. The time I have with them is fleeting. I won't even mind being ambitious and try homeschooling. They're learning together on sharing, being focused on doing tasks, reading books, singing songs, cooking and baking with Mommy, and above all, they're feeling loved, all the time, every day.

Different moms have different callings, I am not saying that everyone should do this motherhood thing the same way. I am simply writing my own story and composing my own songs and living out my own callings.

In a week, Brandon is going to be 2! Wow, time certainly flies.

Sophie turned 2!!!

My baby girl has turned 2! I still can't wrap my mind around the fact that she's already 2. She's so full of joy and life. My wish for her is that she'll continue to grow healthily, and her everyday would be filled with fun adventures and new discoveries with the people that love her. 

Happy birthday girly!